Architecture of Meaning
Cultivating Meaningful Engagement for Highly Gifted Adults and Highly Sensitive People

Sustaining the Gifted Self

The task of caring for the gifted self is life long. In a world that does not speak the language of the gifted, it is a constant process to interpret the relevance of the external world’s messages or values for the gifted soul.

The desire to connect to others, to have meaningful engagement and to belong continue to press upon the gifted soul and can lead to fear based decision making or interaction that throws the gifted soul off center.

It is helpful for the gifted soul to have routines, conceptual reminders and embodied touchstones of what is precious and significant.

The role of discomfort in the life of the gifted soul is essential to accept. As someone with a high degree of perception, a highly developed self awareness, high personal expectations and a rich and complex inner life, life is not simple for you.

Discomfort can be part of how the gifted soul is called to grow and evolve. It is also true that discomfort in this culture is a sign of being fully awake to what remains, as of yet, unseen by the majority.

Ongoing tools for the gifted soul include:

  • Self acceptance – celebrate your nature- clear habits of thought or perception that compare you to others
  • Self validation– fill your world with the rich sources of stimulation that you value
  • Vocabulary – obtain concepts for your experiences of your internal states and of the external world
  • Imagery – find metaphors and visual imagery to explain your experiences
  • Personalized techniques for self care – create ways to limit activities that are too stimulating, boring or demanding
  • Patience in finding the practitioners who honor your needs – identify gifts and limitations of helping professionals.

In a world that does not mirror the needs or realities of the gifted it is essential that you create your own “owner’s manual”. This would include reminders such as:

You are an innovator. Your ability to be flexible in your own expectations of yourself enables you to constantly evolve as you are called.

Times of emptiness or depression can be parts of the process of meaning making, the in between places where that which is not yet formed is incubating.

You are about a process, not a product. You need to be comfortable with the ebb and flow of things.

Finding ever greater inner stability allows you to be available and less disrupted by external times of upheaval.

You need to be independent of social and cultural expectations to feel fully alive.

When you find yourself less able to be at peace with yourself, you can look back at your manual and discover how you have lost yourself and what kind of reframing or clarifying you need to do for yourself or what kind of support you need from others to get back to your center.

We feel purpose and "are" someone precisely to the degree we risk living from, and in relation to, what makes us most alive. – Charles Johnston